I took a test once that showed that I have a moral score of -1, 2 being the highest. I laughed at my score because, well, I do have pretty murky morals. It can actually be said that I have no morals, that I go through my life everyday with what I think is best, not what I think is right.

Which brings me to my next point. Despite the fact that I possess no morals, I am still a very ethical person. The next test I took showed me as an "unofficially ethical" person, which means that despite my lack of certainty about what is right, I still do what is good.

But maybe I don't need to tell you all of that, since you probably already know me from reading all that I've written. So let me just tell you that my great uncle who was in the ICU two days ago is now, in a way, dead. His body has given in and can't work on its own, and my family in SoCal is debating whether he should be taken off life support. It is a difficult question, especially because issues of money will and will always come up. But I think it is even more difficult because neither one of us should judge when a life should end.

When they asked me, I was surprised since I am probably the most morally loose among us. But I told them that he probably shouldn't be taken off life support. I am relieved they didn't ask why because I don't think I can come up with a good explanation.

Before I hung up, my other great uncle told me that we were facing a lot of "trials" right now and that only [the Christian] God can help us now. I was silent, because somehow they failed to see that [the Christian] God was watching them suffer and was doing nothing. My great uncle told me to pray, and I will, just not to the god who failed to come to my rescue when I needed him to.

Labels: religion, thoughts

kitten posted @ 1:53 PM