I'm grinning ear to ear and is that so wrong? Of course not. I too have the right to be happy, to be satisfied, to be unbelievably swept away.

So what's the deal?

Well, I haven't mentioned how I've taken action on this whole Phil-Candy-Kitten matter. (It's not easy talking about it seeing as it wasn't easy doing it either.) I've decided *sigh* to leave the two of them alone so that they may have their happy ending. It's like... their world, it's perfect, and who am I to come barging in and ruining it for the both of them, right? Right.

So I have taken it upon myself to delete, DELETE his number from my phone. (Of course, I've got that number memorized, but still.) I have also decided to uninstall AIM on my computer and delete my AIM account on my phone. Everything amounts to one ultimate thing: I've burned the bridges that connect us. And it was hard. It's only been a couple of days, actually. But it's a start.

Or perhaps I should say it was a start.

I was soaking my feet a while ago (If you haven't done this, try it. It's very good for the body and the mind, I tell you.) when my phone vibrated. I received a text message. I thought it would be Mai or Jen asking me where I was. So I opened it and there it was...

No like talking to me no more? =(
From: +1201779****
12:59pm 29-AUG-07

It took me about two seconds to realize who the message was from, ten seconds to start panicking and fifteen seconds to start jumping for joy.

I was on the phone with my friend a while ago and all I could say was He missed me. And I believe, no, I know it's true. He has missed me. *beams* I thought I would fade into the background and that will be the end of it, but no. It's not. I'm glad that it's not.

Of course, I shouldn't really be celebrating, seeing as it will probably take, what, one day, for the harsh reality to slap me in the face and bring me back down from the clouds. That is, after all, the primary reason I want all of this to be over. It's just hard being let down. No, it's hard not being able to ask for what you want and end up being let down.

My friend said, It will feel terrible after[getting hurt].

And I could only say, But it feels great now.

P.S. If it interests you, I messaged him back. I asked him where he was. My exact words, I believe, were: Where are you? and he replied with I'm on my way to work. I then replied with Boo. and that's the end of it.

Labels: love

kitten posted @ 7:42 PM