Fil. (v) didn't go as planned.

Ayun. If I were to pick a word to describe this day, that word would be napurnada.

I was supposed to bring him his last paycheck. I was supposed to surprise him (He asked me to take it to him, I said no but I was going to take it to him anyway.) I wanted to get him new sneaks (His old ones gave up on him already.), stop by Cosi to give him the sneaks and the check, and he was supposed to find it unbelievably sweet. He was supposed to tell me it was the sweetest, craziest, most romantic thing anybody's ever done for him...

But no. He picked up his own check.

When I saw him, I was frozen to the spot. For two seconds there was a million customers between us and then it was just him and me, everything else just faded.

Why are you here? I sounded angry. I was angry.

Why else? To see you, of course. He, on the other hand, was happy.

Leave. I said it with the same tone I used to ask him why he was there. I... I just couldn't believe he was there.

Why? he asked.

Because... Just leave! If I wasn't screaming before, I was screaming then.

What happened today? he asked me.

Nothing. Just leave. I was breathing hard. My hands were shaking.

What? Talk to me. What happened?

I kept quiet. I had nothing to say.

Is Miss Kitten too good to talk to Phil now? he then asked.

No, of course not, I said then sighed. I was supposed to come to Cosi. I was going to take your check.

He looked at me and asked, Were you?

Yeah, I was. I didn't tell you because it was supposed to be a surprise. I started writing his name on the check release form, but my hands were shaking.

You could still go, he said, taking the pen from my hand, our fingers intertwining for a second.

No, I can't, I said.

Yes, you can he argued.

No, I can't! He was starting to tick me off again.

Why not?! I guess he was getting ticked off too.

Because... Because... Just leave! I was on the brink of tears. I walked out of the room. It was too much...

And then she was there.

*forces a laugh* I should have known, of course, that she would be there too. I don't know why I didn't expect it, why it caught me off guard, but what does it matter anyway?

I was ready to start bawling. I walked to the farthest end of the counter.

She kicked me out... She kicked me out... Phil was saying this over and over again. Candy was just like What? Why? And Phil just kept saying She kicked me out...

I was avoiding their eyes. I had not the strength to endure any more... Then they started walking away.

Bye, Kit. That was Candy. I acknowledged her with a nod.

I looked at Phil for a second, only for a second, but he caught my gaze. The way he was looking at me, I can't explain it, but it kinda said Why are you doing this to me? I held his gaze, tried to tell him I was sorry...

Poor, little puppy. :(

Labels: love, nonsense

kitten posted @ 11:13 PM